From Dislike to Like

First of all, it normally doesn't take me a whole month and then some to read a book like this. I honestly began Jessica Knoll's LUCKIEST GIRL ALIVE absolutely hating the main character, TifAni. She is, in the first few chapters of the novel, a true first-rate biddy. I disliked her character so much, I honestly wondered if I would ever finish reading the book. She is raunchy, rude, disrespectful, and obviously marrying Luke for all the wrong reasons. 

So what brought me back to the book, ultimately, so I finished it? 
     1. I hate leaving books unfinished. I've only done that a few times in my life and it always makes me feel bad when I do.
     2. A very good friend told me that I need to keep reading because it does get better. Her words kept resounding in my head whenever I looked at the book and I knew I would finish reading it. 
     3. I knew that at the center of the story, TifAni had been gang-raped. I had read an article prior to my ever even purchasing the book where Jessica Knoll discussed the fact that the book was, in part, based on her real-life experience of having been gang-raped in high school. As much as I couldn't stand TifAni in the beginning, I wondered if she had come to the place of being such a biddy because she had never dealt with or coped with what had happened to her.

I will tell you honestly that LUCKIEST GIRL ALIVE is NOT an easy book to read. The language can be offensive at times--as a Christian, I just cringe at foul language--and the descriptions of sexual acts are detailed enough to make me blush furiously even though I read the book when I was alone. So if you choose to read it, just go in with your eyes wide open.

I do not regret finishing this book at all. While TifAni never really "redeems" herself as a biddy character for me, I did come to a place of understanding TifAni--as much as is possible for someone who has never been through the same experience. What I do understand, completely, is "that moving on doesn't mean never talking about it, never crying about it" (336). 

Trauma of any kind changes a person. The world around us has difficulty dealing with our trauma, but what the world around us doesn't seem to understand is that dealing with our trauma is a thousand times more difficult for us---the ones personally affected by the trauma. Just because I smile, laugh, sing, and live a life of joy as much as I am able does not mean that I have gotten over or will ever get over my trauma of losing 3 babies as well as the trauma of almost dying. It is a daily CHOICE to move forward and live life to the best of my ability, doing the best I can with each day, each difficulty, as it comes.

So thank you, Jessica Knoll, for writing a book that brings such a truth into the light and opens the door for conversations to happen as a result.....

If there is only one book you ever read.....

Obviously, this was not my first time reading Harper Lee's wonderful TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD, but reading it as an adult vs. reading it as a young person are vastly different!  I loved the book when I first read it more than 25 years ago.  I have always remembered it and have told anyone who would listen that it's one of THE greatest books ever written and that it should be REQUIRED reading for EVERYONE.  Reading it again as an adult, it's still one of THE greatest books ever written and I still believe that it should be REQUIRED reading for EVERYONE.  It seriously is just THAT GOOD.  Thank you, Harper Lee, for writing such an amazing story.  I can't wait for the new book being released later this year!!!!